Sunday, March 28
On Friday I went to the library, and they were total dicks about giving me a library card.
I showed them my license, which should be proof that I'm a resident, but this old guy wanted to see my
lease or a utility bill as well. I was like, "What? My address is on the license, jerkass." And then the
old guy was all like, "We don't use that kind of language in the Hoboken Library, young man." And so I
go, "Whatever, Old Guy. You're just jealous because I'm King Ding-a-ling. All sitting on my throne eating
beefaroni sandwiches and shit." And then I stormed out, strutting like I'm the cock-of-the-walk. Which I
am.
Books. Who needs 'em anyway? Laura gave me herpes for my birthday. Err... not herpes. What's the word? Gift Certificate. Yeah, a gift certificate to Barnes & Noble's. So I can still buy books if I need them. There's nothing in books that you can't learn from watching Oprah anyway. Tons and tons of Oprah.
I showed them my license, which should be proof that I'm a resident, but this old guy wanted to see my
lease or a utility bill as well. I was like, "What? My address is on the license, jerkass." And then the
old guy was all like, "We don't use that kind of language in the Hoboken Library, young man." And so I
go, "Whatever, Old Guy. You're just jealous because I'm King Ding-a-ling. All sitting on my throne eating
beefaroni sandwiches and shit." And then I stormed out, strutting like I'm the cock-of-the-walk. Which I
am.
Books. Who needs 'em anyway? Laura gave me herpes for my birthday. Err... not herpes. What's the word? Gift Certificate. Yeah, a gift certificate to Barnes & Noble's. So I can still buy books if I need them. There's nothing in books that you can't learn from watching Oprah anyway. Tons and tons of Oprah.
View My Stats